I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
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