Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
i believe in u and ur pee
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
