"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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