he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Drunk is not a location!
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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