Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
