Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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