you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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