Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize