My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
