whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
