I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
he thought i was a dude.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Randomize
