the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
