And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
