He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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