How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
