So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Randomize
