trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
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