I think scott just propositioned me for sex
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
