how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
My penis needs a shock collar
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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