woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
