angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
