I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
