You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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