i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
