I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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