woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Randomize
