So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
