im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
