there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I looked at my own cervix.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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