at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I just cut my nipple shaving
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
