Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
