Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
