ugly people sure do ruin things
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Randomize
