he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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