Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Bang-toberfest begins!!
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
