im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
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