rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance