just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.