Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
