You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
