Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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