No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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