I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
