She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Found the puke drawer
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
