it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
