winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
