im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
