so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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