the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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