How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize