i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
and she was petting her beer can
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
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