We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
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