so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
