She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
